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Me Kong Delta - on with the story

River, did I say river? I guess I did. Okay, maybe I didn't - sue me. Indeed, I accomplished that wee trip to the Me Kong Delta. It took a bit to find a setup that sounded appealing, but that dealt with, there was no stopping our trio from making tracks to the swamp. Our small tour group, as promised by the tour operator Innoviet, only consisted of five (day 1) and then three (days 2 and 3) people in addition to our guide "Jen". Cementing the proposal was that our chosen outfit additionally promised that we wouldn't be running into other tourists. And this, for the great part, occurred as stated.

We went to a number of off-the-beaten track places - or so they seemed, since we didn't bump into the afore-mentioned evil "other" tourists - to get a feel for the area, using a grabbag of transports. A homestay and visiting various factories and/or artisans would be a focus of our schlepping about, plus we'd also visit some of the better known places like Cai Rong and Can Tho, the largest floating market and big town of the Delta, respectively. In the former's case, we just got up at 5am to beat the other boats by a few hours to see all of the wacky market activity. Not to mention to beat the sweltering heat. This was important beyond measure. And this thinking outside of the box, or outside of others' schedules anyway, formed the basis of our motion.




Indeed, motion was the operative word: large chunks of our time were not-unwillingly spent on various road- and watercraft. When not rowing or puttering through canals, we were biking or hiking through paddies and markets. On day 1, our movingest day (sans tears), we in fact counted 11 types of transportation that we took (lessee...bike, cyclo, ferry, rowboat, tuktuk, bus, minivan, jeep, jeez I forget - come on!). This stringing together of transport to get us from A to B to J was impressive, we all agreed.

But even better than this endless menu of vehicles was the solitary and profound reality of the following: the mozzies (mosquitos, you cretin!) didn't like my blood in the least! All this trepping about jungle and marsh to tempt all but the most lazy of pesky blood-suckers, and no bites. Impossible! The Mr. Stigmata of South America had finally found salvation in Southeast Asia! I was ready to sign the moving papers to this hallowed corner of the tropics. Heat, glorious heat, and no bugs! However - they apparently DID like the French brand de sang. So as I basked in not even bothering to wear repellent, the others got nailed while awash in the chemical soup, including our Viet guide. I was so pleased, I coulda bitten myself.



What's on the stick was what was on the boat. Now BUY,damnit!



After somehow managing to jampack a zillion little activities into day 1 (and 2, for that matter), and in a seamlessly laidback way, we made our way to our homestay on night 1. We all took our hats off to Innoviet for pulling off the feat as the sun finally set. We saw, made, or made ourselves rice paper, spring rolls, bricks, chopsticks, rice wine, coconut candy and other stuff I've already forgotten, and more was to come. Very memorable! At the time, anyway - sampling is a great thing. To top it off, we ended the day by eating a humble Me Kong family's infant...oh, I guess you really ARE reading this! Ahem. Strike that, then.



Our homestay house on a wee island.



River marketing, as it was.


Day 2 was another smorgasbord of activity. A buddhist temple started our day, with singsong children taking their turns chanting. First it was a pair of boys, then a pair of girls. Self-conscious of our observing them, they nevertheless continued their hypnotic droning. It dawned on me quickly that I could actually stay there all day and listen, at this most ideal spot relaxing among the gardens. Plumeria, or temple flower - a favorite of mine - added to the aroma of incense. Such an environment could make for plentiful converts, if it wasn't for the shaving of the head and loose robe wearing, I figured. Then again, others might have been drawn in for precisely that...



We eventually left our homestay and tooled for a few hours up the river to Can Tho as the day's heat bore on. As our cargo boat plowed its way, we alternated between dozing and gazing out the portholes while trying to find comfortable positions. Naked kids swimming in the river purposefully flashed their private bits to us as we passed by holding up our cameras, leading us to no short amount of wonderment at their boldness. We further wondered about what coulda prompted that. Had previous groups taken pictures of, or asked for, such a display? Uh, no thanks. We didn't EVEN want to know where that all came from. Better, and more picturesque, were people bathing (modestly) and/or washing clothes in a rudimentary fashion on the riverbanks. Whew.


Also interesting were the many boats going this way and that, bringing goods to market via the maze of riverways. Amazingly, some barge boats were so heavily laden that water sloshed over their midsections. Yet, they magically moved down the lazy stream. We surmised that that must somehow have gone against the laws of physics, or at least common sense, but there they went. The Viet Namese shipping industry was as intrepid as their airlines.



Many of said vessels had eyes painted on their prows, supposedly warding off sea serpents that could be eyeballing them from below. Or perhaps it was better to avoid the floating garbage that someone had winged out of their house into the river. Got me. For the smaller boats, the propeller was interestingly extended a few meters away from the ancient sputtering engines via a steel rod. This in turn was just barely placed under the surface of the water. There it stayed propelling one forward until, at least, it inevitably got caught in some floating leafy muck or an old rice transport sack (speaking from experience here). Then it got pulled up in a hurry.


All the while, everywhere the heat bore down, and it seemed that perhaps this was what focused all life back to the (supposed) coolness of the river. As a matter of record, none of us actually got in the muddy opaque liquid over the three days, a cowardice in retrospect. At the time, however, it was never even a question. As we neared Can Tho, the banks became increasingly lined with stilt houses of ramshackle make and, more curiously, unknown plumbing circumstances (though one could guess...). That in itself was a hell of a deterrent to taking a plunge.


Infrastructurewise, signs abounded that pointed to a future cleaner and more efficient Delta. To start, that would be effected by the lesser number of sputtering diesel engines, since large bridges to preclude them were being built with foreign assistance. These were sure to have a major impact on this river way of life as they came into service. Ferries to cross rivers, and barges heading down them, would decrease, undoubtedly, as a fleet of trucks and trains were destined to grow. Only time would tell, but the betting was that massive change to this delta lifestyle would be the outcome - and it wasn't far away, either.


This, however, had nothing to do with the fact that by day two of sweating buckets, I had come to the conclusion that I'd not be extending my Me Kong Madness after all. No going upriver in search of Kurtz for me. Enough of the freaking heat ball. Thus command decisions from a crafty traveler are made (that'd be me, for the record).


Nevertheless, there was still Can Tho to explore, and then the morning market of Cai Rong at the crack of dawn. The former was pretty alive in the evening, and we were on our own to find dinner and a beer. Nothing doing for us intrepid - there's that word again! - travelers, of course, and soon we were seated on a sidewalk watching night settle in. For the morning, we finally made our way to the big market on the water, the famous Cai Rong. Here we found that market activity chiefly consisted of trading the pile of watermelons on one boat for the sack of garlic on another - not exciting, but certainly picturesque, which was the point of the exercise from the tourist's point of view. Those camera clicks finally managed, only some further puttering about the river was all that remained of our tour before we were to catch our bus back to Sai Gon. We had Me Konged, and survived. It didn't seem a fair exchange, our taking their coconut candy and fish while they got our sweat drippings. But it was too hot to think the matter through further.



Shave and a haircut on the river, self-service.



Some crazy French folk. Julie, Sebastian - the PRIDE of la France! (I take cash, too.)(and I can insert you wherever into this narrative - see my agent for a menu of possibilities.)


More Me Kong images...



Intrepid explorer of heroic proportions.



Jackfruit on the vine. Great stuff, believe you me. Or I'll come n git you.



The ancient sport of boat hopping. Repeat to and fro 1000 times. Okay, so I lied - it's an activity, not a sport! Tell me something new.



Single speed, Me Kong style.



No, li'l Buddha is not a Nazi. Look it up.



No, it's not corn.



Don't even tell me you can't find something interesting to eat.



Our tour guide, about to be fired in a brick oven. Sorry, but that's the way it goes.



Hold it! Hold it! Hold it! Now that's strong tea.



Cupping - Chinese medicine at work.



Doesn't matter where you put 'em, all houses have the same footprint.



Melon boat on the way to Cai Rong through Can Tho.



The famous elephant ear fish of the Me Kong Delta. Tasty, just a lotta work for little payoff.



And I'm worried about weight load for my upcoming Australian Bike Tour...



Not a bad "restaurant" view from a canal on a Me Kong island.



Homestay table setting at the fish pond. Not a bad place to sweat.



Rambutan on the vine. Soon in da belly. Similar to litchi.



Them extenda-propellers that are constantly adjusted in motion.



The eyeballs keep everything running smooth on the water.



Home stay in the Me Kong delta. Yep, that's a wooden plank to sleep on. (Slept well.)



Old school run to the market. I'm not jealous.



Who cares what it is! Just buy it and figure it out in your yap.

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